Baby steps, y'all

The journey of a thousand miles begins with single step. I guess....at least that's what they say. Whoever "they" are. (Technically, "they" would be Confucius in this case. It was him. He said it.)
My steps, it turns out, are little teeny tiny baby steps. But they are steps all the same.  So I suppose you could say my journey of a thousand miles has begun.
During my pregnancy with Zoe, I craved sweets like a heroin junkie. And now, sadly, I kinda am like a junkie. My body got used to receiving sweets and refined sugars really regularly, and now it literally craves them. I would say I eat mostly healthy, but I have had a serious challenge getting off the sugar train since Zoe was born. In this post, I pointed out how quickly I noticed my body craving garbage. It is truly astounding how fast our bodies become accustomed to and even dependent on the things we put in it, good or bad. Breaking those habits and addictions (if we are to call them what they are) is why it is so hard for us all to get healthy and lose those extra LBs. It's not just about creating new habits of eating the right things and getting more exercise. It's also about ending the bad habits. If you've ever quit smoking or kicked another kind of addiction, you know how hard that can be.
So anyway, my teeny tiny baby steps. Yesterday we went to our church small group. During our meetings there is always some sort of snack, usually a dessert, and coffee. I don't usually have coffee because then I will become this.

 

But yesterday had been really challenging, and I was really tired so I had a cup to make sure I didn't start snoring during our discussion. By this point in my day, I had managed to avoid anything sweet aside from fruits. So I was kind of faced with the dilemma of "have the coffee with the real sugar and stay awake" (I use agave nectar at home for my coffee) or "skip the extra sugar consumption but fight to stay awake for the next 2 hours". Obviously, I went for the coffee. Then we got upstairs and there was a bowl of amazingly delicious chocolate chip cookies on the table. Oh my. They looked delicious and I was REALLY hungry. So I caved and had one. BUT a week ago, I would have had two or three and beaten myself up about it afterwards, regardless of whatever stupid justification I gave myself for "deserving" them, or how everyone else had more than 3 cookies, or whatever. It may have taken a two hour long silent argument with myself, but in the end I fought the urge to keep going back for more. Baby steps y'all....baby steps.